I love the character of God. He continues to reveal Himself and that amazes me. Just when we “think” we know Him, He shows us, always in His love, that we are still just at the surface of His grace and greatness. He totally allows my heart to be pressed with the temptation to doubt everything He is doing in my life. Why? Because He’s been working in my heart, I am more aware of the temptations that drive me back into His arms. You see, I never leave His arms, He always has them around me. But in the times of temptation or doubt, I know that I can bury my face into His chest and He reminds me to just rest assured that He’s got me and many things will come along that will try to lure me away, but His hold is firm. I am to rest in His arms. This is the place Jeff and I are right now, we are resting in His plan. I can’t really explain it and most people probably think we are crazy, but this is where He has us. It’s an amazing place to be. I’ll gladly quote myself from a previous blog — “An amazing sense of belonging, aside from our unmerited salvation and adoption into the royal family of God, is knowing that you are exactly where God wants you to be, here on earth.” We are truly resting in this. We are where He wants us, and we are going exactly where He is leading us; this is His plan.

The closer we are getting to being planted in San Francisco, the more I am asked, “What’s your back up plan?” Usually I just chuckle, laugh sheepishly and reply that I don’t have one. But the more I think about it, I now get frustrated with everything – people, myself, God. First of all, I think I get hurt more than anything that people who love me and also love the Lord would even ask me a question with any hint of doubt. I don’t know, it seems that I get more doubtful responses about our moving to SF from my fellow saints. I think its kind of funny. Here we are preaching to people to trust in Him for EVERYTHING and to listen to His voice. Yet, when one of us share that He is moving, speaking and we are trusting, there is always quite a bit of disbelief amongst the saints. Isn’t that kind of strange?

Shouldn’t we be the ones to come alongside our brothers and sisters when they are sharing their heart and how God is working in their lives? Who are we to doubt what the Lord is telling them? I know that I am guilty of this state of heart many times. For some reason I feel the need to judge someone about their life or how I think they aren’t doing what God is calling them to do. Ha! So hypocritical and just so sad. Now, obviously if your friend tells you that God is moving them to illegal activity, well, use your brain. But seriously, is trusting God so hard and is His moving and doing as He has promised unheard of? Why is it that when we see someone who is literally trusting Him with everything, which is how is should be, we think it’s our Christian right and duty to “let them know” that they aren’t going about it practically, or my favorite one – responsibly. Since when did trusting God become practical or even responsible? And who are you to tell me what my responsibility is? I’m pretty sure that authority comes from the Lord.

It is in these times that my faith continues to get built on Who has given us the “plan.” I have to remember that this whole idea of being missional does not come from my own brain. I’m not that smart. Sure, I might have some head knowledge, but He’s still working on my heart! I give all the credit to Jesus. He lived a missional life, and that is what God is calling each of us to do, wherever we live, and in our case it will be in San Francisco soon.

I felt led to write on this mainly for my own heart, but I also thought it appropriate to share with you all. There are so many people that hear from the Lord, yet the moment they share it with another believer for prayer or even advice, sadly they are shot down with the “are you sure or are you just crazy” speech.

Proverbs 16:9 — “A man’s heart plans his ways; but the Lord directs his steps.”

I was reminded of this verse the other day (thanks Shalom). I did some research about it and my heart got excited because I’m not crazy! Ha ha. I mean, I think most people are thinking, “Oh wow, they must really love SF to move all their kids there” (which we do, now, but we haven’t always) or “Ok, they are crazy and going about this the wrong way, are they sure they heard Him right?”

So, “direct” in Hebrew basically means “to bring to incontrovertible existence.” And then, incontrovertible means “not open to question or dispute; indisputable.” Moving to San Francisco is a call by God, our authority in life and it is not open for question. I guess we totally could disobey, which I think if He revealed His heart for this plan a few years ago, we would have because our hearts weren’t ready to even think of that.

He stirred our hearts for ministry and we planned to make a 2-3 year move to Australia at the time. It’s funny, our goal was to be there for fall 2009, and now we will be in San Francisco. We were preparing to step out in faith to go to Hillsong Leadership College, where Jeff was going to study for full-time ministry. He has given us both a heart for youth and there was no other school geared toward unconventional methods of study, whereas Hillsong was more “hands on” than bookwork and seminary. This generation is so indifferent, there has to be a better approach to reaching their hearts than just throwing the Bible and some standards at them. That’s religion, not Jesus.

We shared with only a few people, and let’s just say that we were also crazy back then. :) However, we know that He just wanted our hearts. Even though Australia isn’t where we ended up, we totally feel that He used that extreme faith and situation to get us to trust Him. It was the same year that He led us to our new church, Reality and He gave us the word that we were to stay here, for now. Australia was always in the back of our minds, at least in mine. I always wondered when it would come to pass. Then I remember, clear as day when the Lord told me we were going to move to SF. When the Lord leads, I’ll share the full story of our calling, but for now, it should be enough for people to know that we were called and we are going to follow.

I can’t really explain how my heart felt at that moment. I was praying for a solution and He told me that He would use our family in His plan. I wasn’t saying, “Here I am send me” at all. I was crying out for Him to send someone else. It’s so like God to totally turn our world upside down and open our hearts up to everything we thought we never wanted. We never had a desire to move to SF. It was just a few weeks before that Jeff stood on a corner in Lower Haight proclaiming that he could never live in SF. At that time, all we saw was dirt, sin and more sin. We felt the heaviness, oppression, the enemy. It was definitely NOT where we wanted to raise our children. Funny, we weren’t even thinking of ever moving there, but it was just something Jeff said as he looked up the street in disgust. I seconded his statement as I pulled out my hand sanitizer and stuck my hands back in my sweater pocket. A few weeks later, on the same day, in the same worship service but totally separate times with Jesus, the Lord gave us both the word that He was moving us to the City. It’s crazy, but we were both at peace and afraid to tell the other what He said. But once we talked about it, we knew that was our confirmation and we both just wept.

Here we are, almost a year later and preparing to take some of the biggest steps of faith you can imagine. This is when we need the encouragement of our fellow saints. The Lord continues to give us peace and lead us. Just as the verse in Proverbs says, He directs our paths. Believe me, the situation would be a lot different if it were my idea. But daily He seeks our hearts and tells us to rest. He’s spoken in our hearts that He seeks to do some mighty things in our dire situation. I mean, if you don’t know, San Francisco is not exactly family friendly or financially friendly for a family of seven! But, we are loved by an amazing God and He seeks to place us in the heart of the city and we are so privileged to be called.

Jeremiah 32:41 — “Yea, I will rejoice over them to do them good, and I will plant them in this land assuredly with my whole heart and my whole soul.”

Assuredly is such an amazing promise and so powerful when He speaks this to us. Assuredly means firmness, stability, faithfulness on His part. There is no “us” about getting to San Francisco. He has told us that HE will plant us. On our part, we are to just trust, rest and follow His guide. He said He’d plant us with His whole heart and soul. We have a faithful God who always is true to His every word.

I guess I just want to encourage you all that if the Lord is speaking and moving in your heart and life, please just stop and listen. It’s in these times that the enemy will definitely pull well meaning people with advice to sway you from God’s call on your life. Yes, even some of the advice is good and quite practical. But seriously, sending His Son to suffer and die for you is nowhere near practical. We need to stop putting God in a box of our standards. We need to open our hearts and let Him show us His power. We truly believe that He seeks to show His mightiness and power in our situation. It’s totally impossible. But we have this crazy faith and know that He will do all that He has promised.

Jeremiah 33:3 — “Call unto me and I will show thee great and mighty things, which thou knowest not.”

Truly this is just the beginning of His display of power in our lives. He always shows us bits and pieces of His plan always at the right time. Right now, He is showing us that we are to be in SF and we are to rest in Him, knowing that HE will bring our family to the right home, district and people to love on. Ironically, but totally Jesus, the more we go back and visit our hearts have been captured by the Lower Haight. :) We called on Him and He is showing us, so faithfully, His might and the great things He is preparing. I am overjoyed to sit here and think upon all the times over the past year that He gave me the word “Rest” and I always was like, “ok, got it” but still I tried to do it on my own. Not this time! It’s so freeing to just live and truly let God. Some might not agree, but seriously, who do I listen to? It’s so simple and I trust in His WORD. His promises are everlasting and I cannot do anything but praise Him for all He is doing in our lives. God is so good, friends and I can truly attest to that goodness. I am so excited to one day share the entire story with you all. Until then, I will keep sharing as He leads. Let Him out of your box, He seeks to show you mighty things and give you rest!

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